How do you handle the comments (compliments)?

It was an interesting holiday.  We had a big BBQ with lots of people over and it was fun.  Plus I was really good with the food consumption.  I did all of the cooking and we had a huge buffet with lots of options (I stuck to the lean protein and some veggies and fruit). 

I know that I look different and it is a big change but I started to get very self-concious with all of the comments.  I have never liked compliments, basically I never believed them, and felt that people were just saying what they thought you wanted to hear.  Plus, I have spent most of my life trying to fade into the background and not draw a lot of attention to myself.  So, getting a compliment makes me uncomfortable to begin with and having everyone make such a big deal about it made me want to say "ENOUGH ALREADY!"  My step-daughter said "It's an all new you!"  One of our nieces said "You make me sick you look so good.  I don't even want to eat around you."  Another niece made a comment about how skinny I look.  Even their friends made comments, including a young guy that asked "Have you lost weight?  You look different.  I wasn't sure it was you at first."   

Am I the only one that feels uncomfortable with the attention?  How do you all handle it?  I know that a lot of you had to have seen people of the holiday weekend that hadn't seen you in a while and noticed the changes.  What was your response?

Hey Lady J,

I had the same thing happen to me over the holiday weekend. My Aunts saying they didn't recognize me, my cousin continuously saying, "you look good" (well she was the same one that said i shouldn't have the surgery) but nevertheless..........it was a big deal. I felt just like you "enough already" cause you could see the little horns on some of family members rising up. I was happy but it seemed a little overwhelming; I don't know what to do about it cause it's gonna happen every where i go.

the good compliments took a left turn when my friend said, "l looked skinny". My Mom then said, "yea, but i don't want her to get like her friend (who had WLS), she was so rude.........she then proceeded to say............ looking all skinny with a big ole head. Most people who have that surgery look like that.

I politely said..........I'll take a big head over a fat behind any day.

Good for you for sticking up for yourself politely... I just don't understand why people cannot be happy for you and leave it at that.  I know it is going to continue to happen because the weight is still coming off - thank god.  We need a plan so that we can deal with it.  I just don't know what the plan is yet.   

I don't know either because it's summer time and here in Michigan that means less clothing. I think people can finally see that the pounds have come off. I will continue to lose but I feel double-sided cause on one hand i feel like......I'm doing it.....I'm working my butt off, etc. then on the other hand it's like................"stop embarrassing me" - OK enough already.

Maybe a vet can help us.

you could see the little horns on some of family members rising up 

I generally respond before reading what others wrote. 

Now that I've read everyone's replys, I see I've been having a whole different experience.  I'm either far more conceited than I'd realized or far more oblivious. 

Lady J I feel exactly like you.  I've always tried to fade into the background but with the weight loss I'm the topic of every conversation when I walk in a room.  I know that some may take my reaction to the attention negatively but I just feel so uncomfortable with all of the attention.  I just want to lose my weight, get off of the pressure meds and live my life.

I think part of the problem is that my mind hasn't caught up with the weight loss yet.  When I look in the mirror I still see that 313lb person and the complements seem like lies to me.

I am glad to hear that I am not alone on this one.  Maybe a vet can give us some insight.  I think Hugga76 may be right too... my mind may not have caught up with the weight loss. 

The more they see you the less you'll hear... This is new for them as well, and what it sounds like is they're really happy for you... I know it's annoying but as time goes by the comment will slow... It's hard to go from being "invisible" to "hey world here I am"...

What I did was say thank you (a lot).. And I would change the subject (if weight came up)... Now I talk about weight-loss only to people who I know have a weight problem... If you have 10lbs to lose your going to get the diet and exercise convo... If your where I was and thinking about other alternatives I may let you in on what I did...

Rea

Thanks Ladybug.  Good advice.

ok... So I thought it was just me. I have been thinking to my self  "Tanya" what is wrong with you. When you were fat you longed for someone to tell you how cute you look, and call you skinny, and compliment you every time you turned the corner, and now that all of this is taking place, you cant handle it. I was beginning to think i was losing my mind. WLS is an emotional roller coaster. I dont know why but sometimes i hate the comments and at other times i love to hear them.  I find myself at times avoiding people because i can see the expression on their face before they even speak to me, and I'm like OH GOD she gone' say something about my weight.

I guess i never recieved alot of compliments (other than the you cute to be a big girl") so i never really learned how to accept them. I can honestly say i dont know what my problem is...lol
just glad to know i am not alone and most of all I'm NOT CRAZY